I watched this rather fascinating documentary on the French channel in my cable package called Le Crazy s’enflamme about the Parisian cabaret Le Crazy Horse. It featured the process of putting together one of their artsy nudey shows, from the auditions for new dancers to the finished product. The rigors these girls went through were amazing, from the relentless rehearsals to the necessary sacrifice of personal relationships. It made me wonder why these women dedicated themselves to their dancing to the detriment of all else, almost the way nuns marry Jesus. Why go through all of this just to become a disposable piece of unrecognizable ass to be discarded at the first signs of aging?
There was a bit of background on the cabaret, how it came about during France mid 20th century explosion of love for all things American. The founder was Alain Bernardin, and he was of course banging a great number of his dancers. He looked a bit like the French Hugh Hefner. If there is a single visual that thoroughly embodies the patriarchy, it would be a jolly-faced older man enjoying a parade of gorgeous young duplicate women, an undifferentiated mass of nubile female flesh without end. The individual female can’t stay long in the spotlight; the moment a laugh line or ass dimple shows up on her, she disappears. So why would an individual female subject herself to this treatment?
In the case of Hugh Hefner’s mansion show ponies, the answers present themselves easily: a shot at fame, a comfortable life, money. For the girls at the Crazy Horse the motivation is less obvious. They do not get paid much (following one home, we got to see her modest apartment in the banlieue), and they will not be famous. The whole point of the show is the multitude of perfect identical bodies, these girls do not get individual faces. Is it just that they want to be admired? But the audience is not admiring them, it is admiring an idea.
Perhaps it is the idea, then, that draws them. The mythos of the place, the artistry of the shows, what it means to be one of the bodies that form The Body. At some point in their formative years they saw in the cabaret a picture they wanted to be in, like a boy who sees a line of upright men in tidy uniforms and wants to be in the army when he grows up. The singular desire to embody an idea drives them through the strain of their daily grind. Certainly, they are artists. But the simile I used two sentences ago highlights the fluidity of what the word “artist” means–are soldiers, too, artists?
I’m super pissed off and high on cold meds because I’m sicker than I’ve been since I was like 8 years old. It’s all my Mom’s fault too. Firstly because she gave birth to me so everything that happens to me is her fault because I’m alive, but also because she was coughing and wiping her dirty flu hands all over the house for a week trying to infect the rest of us. Obviously she succeeded.
Another reason I probably got sick is because of stress. Although my life probably sounds to the rest of you like it’s made of angel songs and chocolate rainbows, it’s really not. In fact it’s a goddamn mess most of the time, full of stupid assholes like my dog who wants to cuddle me 24/7 even when I have a fever. STOP WITH THE KISSES, JERK. I’M SICK.
School started this week which is always good for a laugh. I start at 7am, which means I’ll absorb roughly .0003% of the material I hear in lecture this quarter. I’m okay with that since most of lecture is the professor secretly wishing something interesting would happen and that they weren’t at a community college so they just read from the fucking textbook for 2 hours. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I raised my hand and said “Excuse me, if you’d like to take a break since you’re so obviously done trying at life I can just come up and do that for you. This will obviously be a surprise to you based on the way you speak to the class, but I too can read passages from the $400 book we’re all required to have. In fact, you don’t even need to come to class tomorrow.”
The other thing that sucks is that relationships always seem to go backwards and wrong over the holidays. It seems like everyone just goes crazy, or gets lonely, or drinks too much and the phone calls and decisions made get out of fucking control. I swear. One guy I dated lost his shit and started asking me for naked pictures, another one professed his undying love, and another one sort of professed his undying love in the guise of telling me I’m really pretty worthless.
The guy I most recently dated caused some drama with my sisters because I mentioned that I still talk to him/hang out with him from time to time and they lost their shit. That sucked, but at the same time they hate everyone I’ve ever even considered dating ever so I took it with a grain of salt. I’m not defending any of my boyfriends, but I haven’t been murdered yet so there’s that. Mostly they just think I’m turning into a towny loser/or already am so I think things will get better once I move out of this town. Either that or it will get worse, those are usually the two options with things like life.
So this guy that I dated for not very long was really pretty nice to me until shit went bad. Then it went really, really bad. I’ve realized over the past couple of weeks that probably the main problem with the entire situation was that he pretty much thought I was a piece of shit and I was too drunk to realize it. That’s a blunt way to put it I spose, but its true. It always made me wonder when he never cared what I did or who I did it with, never got jealous, never worried about how I felt about him, etc. The options are a)he was dating other people or some variation of that b)it literally never crossed his mind that anyone would ever waste their time with me, or c)both.
I’m picking c because here are some things he actually said to me: “You’re not anything to brag about.” “You and your ex were just a couple of fucking losers pretending you were important.” And he spent a lot of time talking about how gorgeous his exes anatomy was (the second guy I dated who has done this, which should have been a warning sign). The only thing he ever said he liked best about me specifically were my eyebrows. Not to say he never complimented me, but for whatever his standards were I obviously didn’t measure up. And that sucks. I’m not saying I’m the hottest person alive, or even the nicest, but it would have been cool to look back and at least know I was memorable. Long story short, it’s always a blow to the ego when you date someone who laughs off the idea of anyone else wanting to date you (other than your crazy exes) and finds you physically mediocre in every way.
My solution? HUGE ASS IMPLANTS. Try and forget THESE, fuckers! Whooooo!!!!!
Japan panics about the rise of “grass-eating men,” who shun sex, don’t spend money, and like taking walks.
Ryoma Igarashi likes going for long drives through the mountains, taking photographs of Buddhist temples and exploring old neighborhoods. He’s just taken up gardening, growing radishes in a planter in his apartment. Until recently, Igarashi, a 27-year-old Japanese television presenter, would have been considered effeminate, even gay. Japanese men have long been expected to live like characters on Mad Men, chasing secretaries, drinking with the boys, and splurging on watches, golf, and new cars.
Today, Igarashi has a new identity (and plenty of company among young Japanese men) as one of the soushoku danshi—literally translated, “grass-eating boys.” Named for their lack of interest in sex and their preference for quieter, less competitive lives, Japan’s “herbivores” are provoking a national debate about how the country’s economic stagnation since the early 1990s has altered men’s behavior.
Newspapers, magazines, and television shows are newly fixated on the herbivores. “Have men gotten weaker?” was one theme of a recent TV talk show. “Herbivores Aren’t So Bad” is the title of a regular column on the Japanese Web site NB Online.
In this age of bromance and metrosexuals, why all the fuss? The short answer is that grass-eating men are alarming because they are the nexus between two of the biggest challenges facing Japanese society: the declining birth rate and anemic consumption. Herbivores represent an unspoken rebellion against many of the masculine, materialist values associated with Japan’s 1980s bubble economy. Media Shakers, a consulting company that is a subsidiary of Dentsu, the country’s largest advertising agency, estimates that 60 percent of men in their early 20s and at least 42 percent of men aged 23 to 34 consider themselves grass-eating men. Partner Agent, a Japanese dating agency, found in a survey that 61 percent of unmarried men in their 30s identified themselves as herbivores. Of the 1,000 single men in their 20s and 30s polled by Lifenet, a Japanese life-insurance company, 75 percent described themselves as grass-eating men.
Japanese companies are worried that herbivorous boys aren’t the status-conscious consumers their parents once were. They love to putter around the house. According to Media Shakers’ research, they are more likely to want to spend time by themselves or with close friends, more likely to shop for things to decorate their homes, and more likely to buy little luxuries than big-ticket items. They prefer vacationing in Japan to venturing abroad. They’re often close to their mothers and have female friends, but they’re in no rush to get married themselves, according to Maki Fukasawa, the Japanese editor and columnist who coined the term in NB Online in 2006.
Grass-eating boys’ commitment phobia is not the only thing that’s worrying Japanese women. Unlike earlier generations of Japanese men, they prefer not to make the first move, they like to split the bill, and they’re not particularly motivated by sex. “I spent the night at one guy’s house, and nothing happened—we just went to sleep!” moaned one incredulous woman on a TV program devoted to herbivores. “It’s like something’s missing with them,” said Yoko Yatsu, a 34-year-old housewife, in an interview. “If they were more normal, they’d be more interested in women. They’d at least want to talk to women.”
Shigeru Sakai of Media Shakers suggests that grass-eating men don’t pursue women because they are bad at expressing themselves. He attributes their poor communication skills to the fact that many grew up without siblings in households where both parents worked. “Because they had TVs, stereos and game consoles in their bedrooms, it became more common for them to shut themselves in their rooms when they got home and communicate less with their families, which left them with poor communication skills,” he wrote in an e-mail. (Japan has rarely needed its men to have sex as much as it does now. Low birth rates, combined with a lack of immigration, have caused the country’s population to shrink every year since 2005.)
It may be that Japan’s efforts to make the workplace more egalitarian planted the seeds for the grass-eating boys, says Fukasawa. In the wake of Japan’s 1985 Equal Employment Opportunity Law, women assumed greater responsibility at work, and the balance of power between the sexes began to shift. Though there are still significant barriers to career advancement for women, a new breed of female executive who could party almost as hard as her male colleagues emerged. Office lechery, which had been socially acceptable, became stigmatized as seku hara, or sexual harassment.
But it was the bursting of Japan’s bubble in the early 1990s, coupled with this shift in the social landscape, that made the old model of Japanese manhood unsustainable. Before the bubble collapsed, Japanese companies offered jobs for life. Salarymen who knew exactly where their next paycheck was coming from were more confident buying a Tiffany necklace or an expensive French dinner for their girlfriend. Now, nearly 40 percent of Japanese work in nonstaff positions with much less job security.
“When the economy was good, Japanese men had only one lifestyle choice: They joined a company after they graduated from college, got married, bought a car, and regularly replaced it with a new one,” says Fukasawa. “Men today simply can’t live that stereotypical ‘happy’ life.”
Yoto Hosho, a 22-year-old college dropout who considers himself and most of his friends herbivores, believes the term describes a diverse group of men who have no desire to live up to traditional social expectations in their relationships with women, their jobs, or anything else. “We don’t care at all what people think about how we live,” he says.
Many of Hosho’s friends spend so much time playing computer games that they prefer the company of cyber women to the real thing. And the Internet, he says, has helped make alternative lifestyles more acceptable. Hosho believes that the lines between men and women in his generation have blurred. He points to the popularity of “boys love,” a genre of manga and novels written for women about romantic relationships between men that has spawned its own line of videos, computer games, magazines, and cafes where women dress as men.
Fukasawa contends that while some grass-eating men may be gay, many are not. Nor are they metrosexuals. Rather, their behavior reflects a rejection of both the traditional Japanese definition of masculinity and what she calls the West’s “commercialization” of relationships, under which men needed to be macho and purchase products to win a woman’s affection. Some Western concepts, like going to dinner parties as a couple, never fit easily into Japanese culture, she says. Others never even made it into the language—the term “ladies first,” for instance, is usually said in English in Japan. During Japan’s bubble economy, “Japanese people had to live according to both Western standards and Japanese standards,” says Fukasawa. “That trend has run its course.”
Japanese women are not taking the herbivores’ indifference lightly. In response to the herbivorous boys’ tepidity, “carnivorous girls” are taking matters into their own hands, pursuing men more aggressively. Also known as “hunters,” these women could be seen as Japan’s version of America’s cougars.
While many Japanese women might disagree, Fukasawa sees grass-eating boys as a positive development for Japanese society. She notes that before World War II, herbivores were more common: Novelists such as Osamu Dazai and Soseki Natsume would have been considered grass-eating boys. But in the postwar economic boom, men became increasingly macho, increasingly hungry for products to mark their personal economic progress. Young Japanese men today are choosing to have less to prove.
This is a poorly writen “review” but my time has been spent elsewhere… Mostly preparing for the Hedo trip. I’ll try to do better next time. Hope you enjoy anyway!
Texas Players Club has an atmosphere that is encouraging and seemingly safe, I was somewhat surprised. It looks much different than the website and the photos I’ve seen, but not at all disappointing. A few stripper poles and dance cages make up for the loss of glam I expected. Our Reserved table was at an elevated level equal to the bar, which served no alcohol but the lady bartender was serving up her own style of mind alterations and the red bull on tap was keeping me alert.
The club was scarce with prospects and I was freezing without any offer to be warmed up! Not that I would entertain such an offer, but I certainly would be entertained by the offer in bed later! There was maybe 20 people in the club which holds a few hundred. I froze like a LA popsicle and was told that the heater would be fixed for our presentation tomorrow night. We both (Gary and I) came from out of town to promote DPT’s tour at Desire resorts this July. My real agenda was to be de-virginized at this “Lifestyle Club.” Little did I know, all the fun was to be held tomorrow at the clubs’ annual Christmas Party, with at least a hundred other people to meet.
Mentioning that this was my first time at a Swingers Club, I was quickly told, “Lifestyle Club”(with the correction in his voice intended to help me, not reduce me) as if I were holding a sign that read, “This is my first time…take advantage of me!“ Being my only adventure thus far in all my 27 years of life to any place promoting such freedom, experience and encouraging sexual liberation, I was taking it in like a “down-home” boy at his first NASCAR race. I started introducing myself, with my thigh highs and garter showing as an invitation for some better conversation than small talk. My short, strapless black satin Christmas dress was accompanied by big blond curls, lip gloss and always friendly yet impish smile.
Taking it all in I saw that this ‘members only’ venue ranged from young to old, thin to large, classic beauties to raw treaded hustlers. From blue to white collar Gents and their decor of women. The similarities were in their civility… but not much more than that. It was almost reminiscent of Cheers, “Where everyone knows your name” and the humility of it all is shared and kept in tact by the very attractive managers, husband and wife team. Her smile could certainly light up any dark place, and her chosen green Santa’s helper outfit made her look like she just walked out of a Playboy magazine. He has an aire of confidence and strength which I must say left me a little wet between my legs and blushed color on my cheeks. I felt more respect from this group of people than that of my local LA posh restraunt bars. The owners are absolutely wonderful and make everyone feel at home in their club, which they have taken a lot of effort and pride in fixing up. I enjoyed my conversation with them in which I learned that they are soon to open their second club. I can’t wait to visit it.
Surrounding the interior walls were artistic photographs showing off the female members in such a way that I was compelled to see each one and try to find them in the crowd, like “Where‘s Waldo“ but for sex fiends. I followed the pictures to the “green room” which is the home of the Symbian. A sex toy with a motor that could mow the most incredible Texas lawns and turn the most stable debutante woman into a sex crazed nympho. Maybe my next trip I’ll have more courage than inhibitions to try it out myself. I continued down the long hall way and jokingly decided they should re-name this passage “Hallmark” as it would be more fitting. The walls were “hall marked” from either the excitement walking into this oasis, or from the exhaustion stumbling out of it.
I came home and drew a stick figure drawing of the orgy I witnessed at the end of the hall. It was the participants were leftovers all thrown in a cooking pot stewing something barely edible… unless you were starving desperate for survival. Excluding the very hot couple at the front of the first bed who started the orgy. Across the four beds was the smorgasborg (I described and later sketched) and ended with an oriental couple watching in bath towels. I awaited the finale, but was fiercely escorted out by the volunteer of the division… stoked bear witness of this recondite ambiance. Never once was I repulsed or left feeling undignified. There is still hope for next time though! My overall judgment is in the favor of The Players Club, “where everyone knows your name, but doesn’t tell.” I can’t wait for Texas Players Club. Hedonism II in Jamaica!
New Year and a new pair of knickers.. well thoughts about what I will do have been on my mind over the weekend and I have come to the conclusion that this year I will not hold back on anything that I want to do or say!.. this may get me in a lot of trouble but life is short as they say and im not getting any younger!.
Working out to get that body is taking forever,its been years since I started exercising but to be fair I haven’t really been pushing myself and only really been maintaining what I have already. So I will push myself harder this year because to be honest I definitely want my shape to change and it’s not going to do that without intensive input from me!.
Moving on to men, my favourite subject and one I have covered more times that I can remember here on WordPress and I’m not going to get all slutty on you but this bitch needs cock and like fast!! My ability to get guys interested is easy but my personal involvement is limited and by that I mean and here’s a connection to my exercise routine , I DO NOT PUSH MYSELF HARD ENOUGH!!!.
These are the thoughts that have been whizzing through my twisted, bitchy little mind over the last couple of days, I do intend to progress as a person and use my fabulous sense of who I am to move on as a gay man!.
EDMONTON — Edmonton sex stores are game with regulating the adult sex toy industry to keep harmful chemicals — found in the plastics used in some toys — out of the bedroom.
Toronto Liberal MP Carolyn Bennett sent a letter last week to the federal health minister, claiming chemicals used in most sex toys pose a potential health risk for women.
Bennett, a medical doctor, claims chemicals such as bisphenol A and phthalates, which are used to make plastic soft and flexible, may cause hormonal complications at certain levels of exposure.
Federal regulations already prevent bisophenol A from being used in baby bottles and phthalates can’t be used in toys for children’s mouths, but so far there aren’t any rules preventing its usage in sex toys.
When news broke last year that the chemicals used in plastics were linked to potential health complications, Sandy Keeler, owner of Alluring Intimates in Edmonton, immediately headed to her collection of sex toys on the shelves of her store.
She found about 15% of the products she carrried contained the chemicals, which were mostly found in jelly-substance toys.
She said she wasted no time returning the products to the distributor.
Now she says about 95% of the sex toys she receives indicate on the package they are phthalates free, but it still hasn’t seemed to satisfy all customers concerns.
“More and more people are getting into these toys,” said Keller. “You want to make sure it’s as healthy for you as it possibly can be.”
Edith Johnson, assistant manager at Hush Adult Megastore, said the health and cleanliness of the store’s toys is always the No. 1 priority.
Any product that would put customers at risk of health complications should have a hard time making its way onto store shelves, added Johnson, who is also in favour of taking steps to regular the adult sex toy industry.
“We want to make sure the health of the customer comes first,” she said.
Other sex toy stores in Edmonton have also opted to carry phthalate-free toys, but declined to provide further comment.
The top ten free dating sites do not suffer in quality simply because they do not charge a membership fee. Many high quality singles can be found on the top ten free dating sites. Free dating websites choose to monetize their traffic in other ways besides charging their members fees.
PlentyofFish.com: This is the largest and most active free dating site on the internet. The services offered at this site are comparable to paid site service including chemistry matching, messaging and email, and a block user feature.
OkCupid: This website offers a member based matching system and has undergone major upgrading in order to remain competitive. It offers private messaging and match questions which can ultimately put you in control of who can and can not contact you.
Mingle2: Formerly JustsayHi.com, this free website boasts a fast turn around. It takes about one minute, literally, to sign up and offers immediate matching. With user blocking capabilities and monitored use to keep fraudulent users away, this site is growing quickly in active member capacity.
WooMe: This is an extensive video and web cam based website that offers dating services all over the world. For those who prefer video dating services, this is a good choice for free dating sites. You can narrow down search options to find the right match requirements.
RSVP: This Australian based website has been ranked number on in dating site hits. With specialized communities to help you find people of interest, RSVP.com.au has a reasonably high success rate of about 15% to 20%.
SpeedDate.com: This is a unique website that combines internet dating with speed dating. Each potential match is allotted a three minute window to chat via voice, private chat, or webcam. Each three minute session leads to the potential for meeting for a traditional date.
DateHookup.com: This website is highly interactive with free blogs, free chats, free email, and free service. As you browse through the website you will notice that it offers everything that a paid online dating service offers without the price.
WebDate: This free site offers chatting and webcam connections. It also boasts the highest number of photo available profiles. WebDate.com is available in countries around the world.
Down to Earth: This is an affiliate of Match.com. DowntoEarth.com was developed for college aged individuals who want to meet someone special. One of the most unique features of this site is the real ratings system which allows other members to rate the honesty and their experience of another member.
ConnectedSingles.com: This website offer extensive services for free, including the ability to upload photos, voice, and video messages for other members to get a better feel for the likeliness of the match. The matchmaking system sends profiles based on interests and is available in numerous languages.
